Married Gay website

Responses to Modified Klein Sexual Orientation Grid questionnaire

Fri, 14 Mar 2008 05:50:41 +0000

The comment service offered to those who have responded to the Modified Klein Sexual Orientation Grid questionnaire has been withdrawn because the author is unable to keep up with demand.
It will now only be offered to those who are in correspondence with the author.
Copies of responses without comments will still be offered.

Modified Klein Sexual Orientation Grid questionnaire

Mon, 11 Feb 2008 21:21:05 +0000

Requests for copies of questionnaire responses with comments by the author of Married Gay Org have been so frequent in the last few days, that there will be a waiting time of up to about 14 days, before such copies can be sent by email. They will be sent as requested, when time permits.
One or two people who have requested copies have not provided an email address, or have provided an email address which is incorrect, making it impossible for the author to respond.
The backlog is gradually reducing!

Fame? Or not, publicity is always welcome for the Marriedgay.org site

Sun, 20 Jan 2008 12:30:34 +0000

From time to time, the Marriedgay.org site receives publicity. A few weeks ago, I have come to understand that the site was referred to on the Oprah Winfrey show in the United States.
If it was, then thank you!
A while back we were also referred to in an article for the New York Times - "When the Beard is too painful to remove".
We must remember that this site does not only help gay men in marriage along with their wives, but it also tries to help lesbian/gay women in marriage along with their husbands. I believe this was the subject of Oprah's "Wives Confess they are Gay" (9th January 2008) - http://www.oprah.com/tows/pastshows/200801/tows_past_200801.jhtml .
Whereas the author of the site will only give interviews by email, he is happy to enter in this if it is going to help our understanding of sexuality, and in particular gay people in marriage. We now carry thousands of responses from people who have contributed to the various questionnaires.

Modified Klein Sexual Orientation Grid questionnaire - copies of responses available

Sun, 20 Jan 2008 12:11:09 +0000

Recently, I have added the option to people responding to the modified Klein Sexual Orientation Grid questionnaire to receive a copy of their response in PDF format. In addition, if they so wish, they can receive comments based on what they have presented.
If you have already filled in a questionnaire and would like to receive a copy, you can email me through the Contact Page at http://www.marriedgay.org/contactauthor.asp, but you must provide me with information which will help me identify the correct entry and that you are who you say your are.
If you entered your name on the questionnaire (requested as an option) it will be easier to check. This is important as I must maintain confidentiality at all times.

Survey on men in heterosexual marriages who choose to engage in sexual activities with other men

Sun, 6 Jan 2008 16:50:59 +0000

The survey is part of John Nance's dissertation process and attempts to explore the moods of men in this population. He is a Doctoral Candidate at The University of North Caroline at Charlotte.
The survey which only applies to the above group of men who are based in the United States or Canada only (not world-wide) is completely anonymous and no judgment is intended in this process.  It is his hope that the study will lead to greater understanding of this group of men, providing deeper knowledge which will help individuals, clinicians and institutions as they seek to enhance the well being of men in heterosexual marriages who choose to engage in sexual activities with other men.
The survey can be located at http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=laUukRPOaa84cD_2bh5YbbjQ_3d_3d or it can be downloaded mailed to John at the address below.  Additionally, please consider distributing the survey website access information to other individuals you may know who fit this description.
John asks that you please accept his deep appreciation for your anticipated cooperation.
Contact details: John C. Nance, M.A., L.P.C.
Doctoral Candidate
The University of North Carolina at Charlotte
2157 McClintock Rd
Charlotte, NC  28202

Modified Klein Sexual Orientation Grid questionnaire introduced

Sat, 5 Jan 2008 08:45:17 +0000

The Klein Sexual Orientation Grid recognises that there are more aspects to sexuality than the Kinsey Scale alone. The questions related to the grid deal with Sexual Attraction, Sexual Behaviour, Sexual Fantasies, Emotional Preference, Social Preference, Lifestyle Preference and Self-Identification, as well as how they may have changed during a person's lifetime.

The Questionnaires help respondees to come to terms, male and female

Sun, 4 Nov 2007 07:17:52 +0000

Many respondees to Questionnaires have written to say how helpful they are in coming to terms with the situations they find themselves. This is a major reason why it was decided to keep the Questionnaire forms in place for as long as is necessary.
To date, over 2200 responses have been received to the Questionnaires, as follows:
Men about themselves - 1150
Men about their women - 99
Women about their men - 661
Women about themselves - 308

Safety First!

Sat, 27 Jan 2007 07:03:40 +0000

The responses to our questionnaires with respect to Safe Sex have been alarming.
Only 36% of all women responding (from a sample of 45 women) say that they always practice safe sex outside their marriage. This percentage has been fairly consistent as the sample has grown from less than 30 responses.
Only 53% of all men responding (from a sample of 325 men) say that they always practice safe sex outside their marriage. Again, this percentage has been consistent for some time.
THE MESSAGE HERE IS IF YOU INDULGE IN EXTRA MARITAL SEX, YOU ARE AT RISK UNLESS YOU TAKE ALL KNOWN PRECAUTIONS.

An update on responses to our Questionnaires

Sat, 27 Jan 2007 06:55:56 +0000

To date, nearly 1400 responses have been received to the Questionnaires, as follows:
Men about themselves - 723
Men about their women - 50
Women about their men - 475
Women about themselves - 123

We are beginning to learn more about gay women in marriages, and the similarities to be found between their situations and those of their male equivalent.

Questionnaires Not Coming to an End

Thu, 30 Nov 2006 16:06:33 +0000

It has been decided not to end the Questionnaire inputs for the time being.
The reason for this is that people are still filling them in and many of them have found that very action helpful to them in trying to understand the situation they find themselves in.

Questionnaires coming to an End

Wed, 30 Aug 2006 14:24:34 +0100

The Questionnaires aimed at Married Men who could be gay and their Straight Spouses were first put up on the Married Gay site at the end of September 2005. Since that time, we have had over 1,000 responses. It is planned to take down these questionnaires at the end of September 2006 so that they can be reviewed fully.

It is hoped that this will not be the end of the Questionnaires, but that we will be able to set up new Questionnaires focussed on the questions that need to be asked as a result of the first exercise.
If anyone wishes to make suggestions with respect the new questionnaires, please go to the contact page at www.marriedgay.org/contact.html

"When the beard is to painful to remove"

Thu, 10 Aug 2006 13:45:45 +0100

This article was written by Jane Gross and published by the New York Times on 3rd August 2006.

"THEY spend decades denying their sexual confusion to themselves and others. They generally limit their encounters with men to anonymous one-night stands and tell all manner of lies if their wives suspect. "

If for any reason this article is no longer available from the New York Times site, a copy can be obtained on request in pdf format.

Numbers of Questionnaire Responses increasing

Sun, 23 Jul 2006 07:55:30 +0100

The number of responses to the Questionnaires is increasing daily - the total is now just under 900.

Sorting it out

Sun, 23 Jul 2006 07:51:48 +0100

The discovery has been made - one partner or the other has attractions towards the same sex - what happens next?

Are you gay but in a relationship with a member of the opposite sex?

Sun, 23 Jul 2006 07:50:02 +0100

Betty television in the UK is making a new docu-drama about people who are gay or bisexual but in a relationship with a member of the opposite sex......

The Married Gay site may be in English but .......

Thu, 22 Jun 2006 07:25:21 +0100

The fact is, it is being automatically translated into several different languages.
The link here is to a Japanese feed, but there are also German, Spanish and Chinese feeds. Long live the Internet!

Responses received so far

Wed, 21 Jun 2006 07:53:18 +0100

The following responses have been received so far:
Men about themselves - 451
Men about their women - 14
Women about their men - 338
Women about themselves - 35

Total = 838

Keep the responses coming in folks, but lets hear more from men about their women, and from women about themselves!

Excuses, Excuses ......

Fri, 26 May 2006 12:47:14 +0100

A colleague wrote to me and asked whether I thought being sexually abused as a child was a valid reason for a person's homosexuality - she calls it the "Abuse Excuse", something that she has discovered is used by something like 80% of all Married Gay Men......Read more by clicking here

Married Gay Guest Book Closed

Mon, 15 May 2006 13:13:53 +0100

The Guest Book on the Married Gay site had perhaps outlived its usefulness, as there has been for some while little use, other than by those tenuously looking for sexual partners, always refused, and those trying to leave unwanted advertisements.
Visitors to the site are always most welcome to contact the site's author, Michael, through the contact page, if they need to talk to some one.

Extramarital Activities

Wed, 10 May 2006 08:04:16 +0100

Whereas it has been noted for a while in the results of the Questionnaires that more than 80% of men carry on extramarital activities during their marriage, early results such that women also carry on extramarital activities.
The sample for the women is still very small, but early indications are that at least 50% have confessed to doing something outside of the marriage.

Bonnie Kaye's Manreading

Sat, 6 May 2006 06:27:05 +0100

The first edition of Bonnie Kaye's Manreading Newsletter is in circulation, aimed principally at women who are interested in relationships and how to make better choices when entering or staying in one.
The main topic for this month is Medication for Situations and there is a Mailbag.

Married Gay Guest Book

Mon, 1 May 2006 07:41:36 +0100

The Guest Book has been suspended for the time being due to persistent spam attacks, and the guest book database has been removed temporarily from the site.
This is to be regretted but spammers are not tolerated on this site.

Broadening of the Married Gay site and Color Codes on the pages

Sun, 30 Apr 2006 20:55:14 +0100

Originally, the Married Gay site was aimed at men who are married and gay or bisexual. This with time extended to their wives.
We are now gradually extending to incorporating women who are married and gay or bisexual, and their husbands.
To accommodate this, pages are being color coded, white for pages which are aimed at men and women, and "yellowish" specifically for men, and "pinkish" specifically for women.

Questionnaires Update

Sun, 30 Apr 2006 20:47:39 +0100

The responses from men and women who have filled in the Questionnaires for Men who are gay or bisexual and their spouses were reviewed at the start of April and the results of the review can be found on the site.